Being a martyr doesn't help anyone
I wonder if this is you.
Are you that parent - you know the one. The parent who always says they're fine. There's no problem. The parent who doesn't like to accept help and will certainly never admit it and ask for it.
The parent who takes it all on, trying to keep up with everyone and how they feel they should be.
The one that feels like they're drowning but can't seem to say no to anything.
The parent who inside is resentful, shattered and screaming for a break. Willing someone to come in and help but at the same time petrified that if they do everyone will know that they aren't coping.
Often this fear of people finding out that they aren't coping comes from the expectations that the parent has from themselves or other about how it should be.
But here's the thing - they say it takes a village to raise a child and that's true. Why is that do you think...because it's blimming hard!
And that's just one child.
When you have more than one then things only get a bit trickier so in theory parents need more support not less. And not to go it alone.
Being a martyr is not going to help you or others around you. It will lead to you taking on more than you can manage, increasing your stress load which in turn will affect your happiness and how you are with others around you, including your children.
Let's end the shame of asking for help and making parents feel like they should be able to manage it all or there is something terribly wrong - not at all.
We all need a little support at times, we all only have a certain level of capacity and when that's reached we need someone else to assist.
Once you acknowledge how you truly feel this is the first step in making a change.
Overwhelm is debilitating and can lead to mental health issues, physical health issues, damaged relationships and self confidence and trust in yourself.
Admitting you're overwhelmed is not failure - it's called being human.
It happens to lots of people at some point in their life and it can be overcome with the right support but you have to recognize what's going on, how you feel and reach out for help with it.
Let's start to normalize community and helping one another rather than navigating this path alone and struggling.